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Summary
Summary
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER
"Equal parts memoir, whodunnit, and manual for living . . . a beautifully written, honest look at the forces of blood and bone that make us who we are, and how we make ourselves." --Neil Gaiman
In his unique and engaging voice, the acclaimed actor of stage and screen shares the emotional story of his complicated relationship with his father and the deeply buried family secrets that shaped his life and career.
A beloved star of stage, television, and film--"one of the most fun people in show business" (Time magazine)--Alan Cumming is a successful artist whose diversity and fearlessness is unparalleled. His success masks a painful childhood growing up under the heavy rule of an emotionally and physically abusive father--a relationship that tormented him long into adulthood.
When television producers in the UK approached him to appear on a popular celebrity genealogy show in 2010, Alan enthusiastically agreed. He hoped the show would solve a family mystery involving his maternal grandfather, a celebrated WWII hero who disappeared in the Far East. But as the truth of his family ancestors revealed itself, Alan learned far more than he bargained for about himself, his past, and his own father.
With ribald humor, wit, and incredible insight, Alan seamlessly moves back and forth in time, integrating stories from his childhood in Scotland and his experiences today as a film, television, and theater star. At times suspenseful, deeply moving, and wickedly funny, Not My Father's Son will make readers laugh even as it breaks their hearts.
Reviews (5)
Publisher's Weekly Review
Scottish actor Cumming struggles to reconcile with his troubled past in this moving, if oddly structured, memoir. Alternating between three time periods-"Then," "Now," and a span of several months in 2010-Cumming recounts his life on a rural Scottish estate under the brutal reign of his abusive father, Alex. Equally violent toward Cumming's older brother, Tom, Alex was a defining force in Cumming's life, with the emotional and physical scars of his beatings affecting Cumming long after he left home for drama school at age 17. In a parallel narrative, Cumming recounts his experiences as a participant on Britain's Who Do You Think You Are?, a television program on which celebrities explore their pasts, often going so far as to get genetic tests. Even as issues closer to home involving Cumming's ties, or lack thereof, to his father arise (as the book's title might suggest), Cumming is determined to delve into his family history: and find out what happened to his maternal grandfather, Lieutenant Tommy Darling, who served his country in WWII and ended up suspiciously dead several years later in Malaysia, where he was as a member of the police force. While the particulars Cumming learns about Darling are striking and memorable, this really is a case where the journey is more important than the destination. (Oct.) (c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.
Guardian Review
Revelations about his relationship with his father are raw-edged and painful, yet Cumming proves determined to crush bad memories by living a good life In the acknowledgements of this memoir, Alan Cumming thanks his agent for "not exhorting me to do a 'my fabulous celebrity life' type of book", and despite occasional references to hosting charity galas and wearing Alexander McQueen, Not My Father's Son tells two stories that unfold in places far removed from that glamour. One starts in the Scottish forest where Cumming grew up terrorised by his violent, philandering father; the other ends in Malaya where his maternal grandfather, Tommy Darling, died in a mysterious shooting accident in 1951. His appearance on Who Do You Think You Are? allowed Cumming to uncover Darling's life and death, and the show's framework has a slight distancing effect, but the actor's writing about his relationship with his father is raw-edged, stinging and inescapably painful. Just when he thinks he has conquered his past, an end-of-life revelation from his father drags him back in, but Cumming's unsurprising gift for drama never overwhelms the cold realities of the damage done, nor his joyous determination to crush bad memories by living a good life. * To order Not My Father's Son for [pound]7.19 (RRP [pound]8.99) go to bookshop.theguardian.com or call 0330 333 6846. Free UK p&p over [pound]10, online orders only. Phone orders min p&p of [pound]1.99. - Victoria Segal.
Kirkus Review
The award-winning actor uncovers his family's darkest secret. Instead of writing a showbiz memoir with stories of his eclectic career, Cummingwho has won countless acting awards, including a Tony for his role in Cabaretanchors his book with his discovery of the truth about his grandfather's premature death (at age 35) and a recognition of the "dual family narrative" of shame and secrecy. He came to understand that both he and his grandfather Tommy Darling suffered combat stress: Darling as a decorated World War II soldier and the author at the hands of his father. Cumming creates visceral scenes of his father's unhinged, irrational anger during his childhood in the Scottish countryside. He details the physical and psychological violence his father mercilessly heaped upon him, including a beating so ferocious he wanted to die, having his hair brutally shorn against his will with rusty clippers used on sheep, and hearing countless times that he was pathetic and useless. Cumming and his brother learned to shut down their emotions and suppress any feelings of joy, lest their vindictive, tyrannical father remove from their lives whatever gave them pleasure. As an adult, he freely expresses the authentic "pixielike" personality he abandoned in childhood, when he couldn't play and enjoy life. He also kept some totems from his childhood, miserable though it was (he even wore his father's sweater in his first headshot!), since he regards them as "a part of my happiness today, because it is a part of me." From discovering the truth about his grandfather's mysterious death to attempting to understand his father's sadistic nature, Cumming explains that it is important to be candid and forthright, that "there is never shame in being open and honest." A raw, revealing memoir from a courageous actor and writer. Copyright Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.
Booklist Review
The Tony Award-winning, Scottish-born actor and openly gay bon vivant is not your typical Hollywood memoirist, having previously penned both fiction (2002's Tommy's Tale: A Novel of Sex, Confusion, and Happy Endings) and nonfiction (2013's May the Foreskin Be with You: Why Circumcision Makes No Sense and What You Can Do about It). With his third book, Cumming eschews the empty calories of celebrity fluff to share the deeply personal but ultimately life-affirming truth of his harrowing childhood and fascinating family history. Chapters focus on three distinct time periods: (1) recalling his dark past as a victim of unspeakable physical and emotional abuse at the hands of his troubled father; (2) detailing his current success, resilience, and capacity for forgiveness; and (3) delving into the mysteries surrounding the heroic life of his maternal grandfather, as profiled in 2010 on a popular British celebrity genealogy series (Who Do You Think You Are?). Cumming's eccentric style and assured voice shine brightly on every page, while escorting readers and fans on a memorable journey that is simultaneously insightful, brave, moving, and witty.--Keech, Chris Copyright 2014 Booklist
Library Journal Review
Describing growing up the youngest of two in rural Scotland under an abusive father, multiaward-winning actor Cumming (The Good Wife; Cabaret) blends powerfully disturbing childhood trauma with his contemporary search for ancestral clarity as he recounts an enigmatic maternal grandfather named Tommy Darling, a well-respected Scottish servicemen whose disappearance, and demise, had always been a family mystery. Lifelong curiosity leads Cumming on an illuminating path from Scotland to Malaysia as a participant on the renowned television series Who Do You Think You Are? The episodic nature of the text provides the perfect framework for Cumming's discoveries about his grandfather, which include prestigious awards and stunning acts of valor. Drama continues to unfold when his father reveals an explosive secret that turns the entire family on its head. Cumming's dry wit transitions effortlessly to the page, eliciting laughter one moment and gut-wrenching discomfort the next-anecdotes praising the Eurovision Song Contest sit easily alongside dark recollections of being subjected to his father's inexplicable rages. VERDICT While the "then and now" structure, which features frequent chronological shifts, might seem choppy, the memoir sculpts an insightful, relentless examination of Cumming's hardships, alongside keen observations about the continuing effect of abuse on his life. A moving read that fans of the man and of memoirs won't want to put down. [See Prepub Alert, 4/21/14.]-Ashleigh Williams, School Library Journal (c) Copyright 2014. Library Journals LLC, a wholly owned subsidiary of Media Source, Inc. No redistribution permitted.
